Meet Your Spirit Guide.

Yesterday was a full moon with an Eclipse. The energies were high and their was a joy in the air. I saw a report that yesterday was the first day in recorded history that there was no violent crime in New York City. The shift is happening. More people are waking up and starting to realize what is important in life. It's all very exciting.

I did a meditation to contact my spirit guide. I've done these before, but have not really gotten anywhere. The energies were so high, I thought I would try it again. In the meditation, I went into a field by a huge tree and asked my spirit guide to appear. A tall, beautiful Native American man appeared. My heart leaped, I rushed to him, hugged him, and held his face between my hands. I can't accuretly describe the joy that I felt seeing him again. It was a reunion with a long lost friend. His name is Standing Bear. I think he was given that name because of his huge size. He was tall and broad.  We sat under the big tree. I was curled up in between his legs like old friends cuddling. I asked him a few questions and it was as if he answered before I could even finish a sentence.

"Will I be a great Healer?"  

"Yes, You already are, just believe."
 

"Will there be an event like 3 days of darkeness to wake people up?"

 "No, it's not going to be that easy." He says with an easy smile. "There is still much work to do."
 

All to soon it was over. I know that I will be contacting him again and hope that this is the beginning of a good relationship. Hopefully I will get to the point where I can contact him & hear him without meditation. 

Here is the link to a Youtube guided meditation that I used to help connect with my spirit guide. I hope it brings you much success too.

Releasing Grief

We are all going through an energy upgrade right now including the Earth. In this shift of energy the Earth and its people are releasing grief. Grief though necessary, can become so part of our identity that it stops us from enjoying life and growing into our future selves.  Intellectually most of us can reason that our loved ones are "in a better place" or that "we'll see them again", our hearts however are not intellectual. Our hearts hurt at the devastating loss of a loved ones, of things left undone, of words left unsaid. What grief are you holding inside? Ask God and your angels to help you release any negative emotions inside you that are holding you back.  You may receive help through your dreams, messages from others and animals.

 I lost my dad 12 years ago and while I miss him, I am blessed with regular visits from him in my dreams and in the waking world. I honestly thought I was through the gut wrenching grief process. I was so wrong. I had a night of back to back dreams that I couldn't seem to stop or wake from. The dream that hit me the hardest had my great-grandmother in it. Who knew that I still held loss inside for her as well. In the dream I went to tell my dad that his grandmother had passed. I was sad and even feeling lonely without her in my life. Just then my dad looked stricken, in pain and slumped on the couch. I screamed at him and he opened his eyes and said "You are going to be just fine" and then he passed. The sound that emitted from my throat was one of intense grief, pain, and abandonment.  The next sequences in the dream was me telling different people "My daddy's dead". Each time that I repeated that it was a releasing of grief and an acceptance took place. I had no idea that I had so much pain still stuck inside.

I awoke in the morning, remembering all the dreams and cried deep heartfelt sobs. Each gut wrenching sob was a release. I said a prayer of gratitude that I received the healing. Just then Jack, my parrot, began to whistle the "Andy Griffith theme song"  one of my dad's favorites tunes. I smiled and knew that I was going to be just fine.

Girls leading with the Sacral Chakra

On facebook Deborah King posts questions daily to help prompt journaling. A recent question was if a teacher had ever hurt or discouraged us. In an instant my mind went back to the 8th grade.

I went to a small Catholic elementary school that went from K - 8th grade. There were approx 45 kids in my graduating class. For the most part I was an outcast. Kids instinctively know when there is something not right with a kid. When a child is not getting what they need from the home, they don't relate to their peers with self confidence and honestly. When a classmate did decide to let me in or come over for a birthday party, invariably something would happen. My mom would act crazy yelling about something and in some cases even hitting me in front of friends. Or she and my father got into a fight with lots of cussing, screaming, and the threat of violence in the air. Even if a classmate did like me, they would avoid me after that. A glimpse into my world was enough. The general demographic for the school was white children being raised in a two parent household where they were doing their best to project that their households are picture perfect. I am not naive enough to think that my family was the only one with secrets. My family just didn't have the self control to hide it well. I did have one good friend. Her name was Dawn and her family life wasn't the norm either. She was being raised by a single mom when it was just not common. We bonded in our inability to fit in. Things changed when she moved away after the 6th grade year. Seventh grade was really hard for me. I didn't have my one good friend and I was lonely. I still was an outcast with the popular kids and those on the lower social tier in my class just barely tolerated me. I had started making up stories, lying to them to make myself into someone, anyone other than my real self. Kids, they are smart and they can see through that as well.

Something happened during the summer after 7th grade. My pudgy child body transformed itself into a well developed, voluptuous, curvy body. I noticed during the summer at the pool that the older boys were noticing. I realized then that there was power in sexuality. When I returned to school for my final 8th grade year, not much seemed to have changed. I was still the freak, but there was this air about me of knowing, knowing about the power of sexuality and I wasn't afraid to use it. The girls in my class HATED me even more, but now I didn't care. I had found the attention I craved from the the boys.

In my home neighborhood I had also found boys. I would walk my dog to the local park and there would be other kids there. Like moths to a flame. As I explored my power outside of school, my self-confidence increased inside of school. I was transforming. I learned how to flirt and how to use my body to gain what I wanted. At the time it was the only power I held. I couldn't control my father's drinking. I couldn't control my mother's rage and hate. I couldn't control the feeling that there must be some reason I didn't deserve to be loved and cherished. I COULD control my sexuality. I knew that I had something the boys wanted, not only 8th grade boys but high school boys as well. I had the control. One might think that I must have had sex with so many... but that was giving the power away. There was much more power in holding what was wanted just within reach. The thought of what could be granted made quite a few jump through insane hoops.

There was at an evening 8th graduation party with all of my classmates and one of my teachers was a chaperon. During the party, I walked with a guy to get something down the street at his house. Completely innocent. The teacher saw that I had disappeared and when she went with a couple of other girls to find me she told one of them that I was probably "on my back somewhere". When I did return to the party, one of those girls told me in front of the teacher what had been said. I looked at this teacher, someone I looked up to, my English teacher (my favorite subject), she looked back at me and didn't deny it, her eyes confirmed that she had indeed said it. I remember laughing it off and even giving the boy I had left with a look like "oh OK...whatever" I have NEVER forgotten it. In that instant she made me feel like trash, back to that outcast kid who would never fit in.

Was she reacting to the signs I had given? Absolutely. I was a child venturing into the world of sexuality at to young an age. There was nothing innocent about me. I knew exactly what I was doing and who I was manipulating. I understood the power. I was leading with my 2nd chakra, the Sacral chakra.

What angers me the most is that this educator had a choice. She saw what was happening, the changes in me, and she chose to call it out instead of choosing to find out what was going on in my life. Why didn't she take a moment to sit me down and find out why I only valued myself for my physical attributes and sexual power?

Today I volunteer in a middle school and I see the girls that lead with their sexuality, that are trying to find their place in the world, their self confidence by using their body and sexual power. Their female classmates call them Sluts, their male classmates drool, and the teachers just shake their heads. Why isn't anyone asking WHY? WHY do these girls feel the need to exert themselves in such a way. Where is their self confidence in their sports ability, academics, or in being a good person in general? Who or what has taken that away from them? Why are some educators and counselors so afraid to talk about sex that they just want to shake their heads and DO NOTHING? Instead many of them wager "I bet she will be pregnant by the time she is 16".

I read a book recently that helped to put the crisis many young girls face into words. "Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls" by Mary Pipher. This book should be mandatory reading for all middle/high school teachers and even parents of girls. We need to be able to see the signs of kids leading with their sexuality and teach them other ways to have confidence. We need to find out what is going on in their lives that make them feel as if they have no control. When you lead only with the Sacral Chakra, other areas might suffer, self esteem and self worth could be compromised.

Be grateful, even for the annoyances of life

The turtle

Repost from 5/17/11

Yesterday there was this HUGE turtle crossing the road, he was only half way across the road when my brother-in-law stopped him and told me about him. Never one to miss a neat moment I called to Maddie, my 2 year old  and told her we were going to see a turtle. We walked down the street all the while I was answering the same question "Where is the turtle?". I saw a car coming and actually walked into the middle of the street to stop the car from hitting the turtle. Often cars don't realize that what they are seeing is a live creature in the road and not already road kill. I made the decision at that moment that I had to make sure that he made it safely across the road.

So Maddie and I walk up to the turtle and I just can't believe how big he is! Gorgeous! I had no idea if it was a snapping turtle or a really HUGE box turtle. So I started to nudge him across the road with my foot and when he didn't try to fight me or bite I took the gamble and decided to pick him up. He went deep into his shell and I decided to carry him home. All afternoon we watched him and marveled at his size and beauty, and named him HIPPO. :) I even sat and performed Reiki on him. While I was touching his shell and sending Reiki he would pop his head out just a little. I could actually feel his heart beat or life force through the shell. Really neat connecting that way.

Last night I set him in the pasture and told him to go about his life with good health. I told Maddie that the turtle that we named Hippo had to go home and see his family and she understood and told him goodbye.

I was grateful for his brief visit, and I realized that I probably interrupted his day and his journey. It made me think of how many times in our lives someone just picks us up and takes us from our plans and our reaction to this disruption in our routine. What I have to keep in mind is that those disruptions are all important and part of our life path as well. We don't know the plan and all the factors, we have to accept things on faith.

Maybe that slow driver, that is so annoying was what kept us from getting into an accident. There were people on 9/11 who said that it was little things that kept them from being in the twin towers on time. One person broke her heel of her shoe, another stopped to get band aids, one had a child make a mess of an outfit that caused someone to miss a train. All of these things if you look at them are just things that can irk you and make you feel as if the world is against you. However, when you realize that these little problems kept the person from possibly dying that day you realize they were blessings.

I hope that the turtle made his way safely home. It could be that his little detour to my house was not only a treat for us but maybe it saved his life.

Churches need to teach connection to source

I went to church on Sunday. It was the first time in many years. As a recovering Catholic, I am gun shy to say the least. We decided to go to a non-denominational Christian church. The service was cute, small, and had a decent feel to it. . After communion, they sang one verse of a song about 20 times. The verse was about people having complete love for God. The congregation really got into it and each repeat was sung with more feeling. After the fifth repeat I felt the energy lifting to God in celebration. I could see the golden rays of energy coming down as the connection to source was opened. Feeling it in a group setting was incredible and it brought tears to my eyes. The goosebumps raised as I felt Grace wash over me. It was incredible and powerful...

Then church was over and we stumbled out into the sun. It hit me... how incredibly sad. For many people that would be their only peak at the divine they would have until they went to church again. I would wager that most of the congregation does not meditate or participate in energy work of any kind. Often churches lump alternative healing into a group that is taboo, like psychics. (the fact that the bible talks about Prophets, but demonizes psychics drives me nuts, but that is another topic) How sad that the masses are not taught how to access the source on their own. People are often taught from an early age that they have to GO to church or through a priest to feel God's love. What people should be taught is that they have a direct link to God if they would just be still and open themselves to it.  I'm not saying that going to church is pointless. It's a great way to join with community and share a love for your fellow man and God, but it shouldn't be their only link.

The experience made me realize how grateful I am that my unconventional life path has lead me to strive to be connected with God at all times. It also made me realize that I need to make sure that my children know how to access the source on their own. I don't want them to feel that they have to go through something or someone to feel what is theirs by divine right.

Hopes and Dreams are Essential

It is essential that we as humans hope and dream, pretend even. there is no harm in going shopping, trying things on, putting purses on your shoulder to see how they look, holding stunning earrings up to your ears to see how they feel. This doesn't mean you have to buy them. What's important is feeling the surge of these beautiful items in your universe. It's saying to the world that I deserve and will have fine items one day... just not at this moment. It's the hope that your particular money situation will change, that you are not destined to be financially strapped forever.

if you say to yourself that you are poor and can't afford these items, you are putting out to the universe that you are unworthy. That these items or things don't belong with a person like you. what a hopeless state to be in.

The law of attraction is real and it can work for or against you. the choice is yours. By allowing yourself to dream of how great that 28k hand blown chandelier shaped like a school of fish would look in your home, you are putting positive intentions out in the universe. On the other hand if you say to yourself, I like it, but I could never afford it... you are right, you never will,

Dream... Hope... Imagine

The universe will provide for your needs and wants... you just have to believe in the possibility.